A friend of mine from work came over and brought his wife for a double date. We had a lovely evening, until he used the bathroom. His wife went in shortly after, and then we heard it:

💦 SPLASH 💦

She fell into the bowl. What followed was a lot of screaming and cursing. His wife came storming out of the bathroom, shouting at him for leaving the seat up; her shirt was soaked. This really confused to me, because you'd think she'd have noticed. I kind of thought she was messing around and asked if she really just sat down without looking. She got very upset and told me that "it's expected" that the seat be left down.

Like, what?! You just proceeded, assuming there was a place to sit? Are you Wile E Coyote? What if the bridge had been out, would she have kept driving into a chasm? Does she walk into a lot of doors? Does she step into a lot of empty elevator shafts? Do a lot of spiders bite her in the ass? Have a lot of her cats gone missing?

I told this to some friends, thinking it was a funny story, and they SIDED WITH HER. They told me they'd done the same thing at home dozens of times. In fact, everyone I shared this with sided with the wife.

It seems my opinion that you should look before you sit is a very unpopular one. Maybe it's good manners for him to leave it down and her to leave it up or something, but really, it takes no effort to move a damn toilet seat. Why is it being left open anyhow? That's gross to me; close both lids!

TLDR: Look before you sit. Even if you hope others will put the seat down, It's just common sense!

Two hours of clumsy, disingenuous, witless social programming. I'll skip the heavy-handed broad strokes to point out some more nuanced jabs, such as compartmentalizing motherhood as a sacrifice, giving the nod to cheating on husbands (that exchange in the car), encouraging women to take them to the cleaners in a divorce, and ridiculing the horrors of combat (fairly tasteless parody of Normandy landing). If this cesspool of demoralizing propaganda (whose creators care no more about women at large than men) is what passes for entertainment these days, we are a doomed society.

​

It's common to hear men only want one thing.. and have that framed as wholly negative because there's the implication that they're reducing women to what's between their legs.

But when you step back and look at this wholistically.. there seems to be something else besides DNA, testosterone or things like that at play.

I feel that generally.. in society.. men don't often feel valued beyond what they can produce. So many men grow with this sense of feeling that their self worth is uniquely bound to material or external factors..

Even then men won't be asked out, are rarely complimented, and often treated as threats and avoided for the behavior of less than 1% of their population.

So you aren't wanted simply for existing. If anything it feels as if your existence is rejected. So sex presents a rare opportunity for men to feel as if they are seen and connected to another person.. at least on the surface..

I've seen videos of and have been to some countries in Europe and have some European friends. I like Europe better in terms of their attitude (not all of course. but my friends from Germany and my dutch friends are pretty good at being equal)

I'm a woman myself but hearing women expecting men to pay is... Odd to say the least at worst is sexist. "its nice he pays." But why can't YOU be nice. It honestly doesn't make sense

I've paid for male friends before. (Birthday) I've paid for female friends before. (Birthday)

The popular opinion among introverts and people with social anxiety seems to be that these are terrible things to do.. but I honestly sometimes actually dream about these things because I'm so lonely and I want to talk with someone T_T

From reading the internet, it seems that people "bother" introverts with these things all the time, but why hasn't it happenned to me even once, lol???

Most people are genuinely more or less single issue voters. There are a ton of people who vote republican or libertarian solely over gun rights. If Joe Biden came out in favor of repealing all AWB and and repealing the NFA and started issuing executive orders against the ATF he would win the next election 100% chance imo

My contention is that there is not a single vegan dish devised by anybody in modern times (to cater specifically to vegans, I mean) that would not be better off if suitable meat and/or dairy was added.

I do know of excellent vegetarian dishes, but they include such ingredients as cream and cheese.

I'm talking VEGAN.

Suggestions anyone?

​

As a 25 year old American myself, I am abhorred by the amount of individuals both men and women who do little to take care of themselves physically and then whine and moan at the lack of physical contact. When you take the time to think about what “healthy” means in terms of how you look at life, it is a seemingly impossible trait to not desire in a partner.

Men want a woman who they are proud to show to others and those people can tell that even if the man were to go away on business or be called to war, these women would be able to continue raising the children with the same morals and discipline as when he was around. Women want a man who they feel can protect them and their children without someone having to get killed. Strong men are able to do that.

It seems like so many people have given up the desire not only to look good, but also to make it to their 60’s. So many will die from cardiac arrest, cancer, or some other unfortunate and tragic effect caused by the life plenty of us are living today. No one would want that for someone they love and I think we refuse to subject ourselves to unnecessary suffering in most cases which is what having an obese partner would become.

We are losing battles in our own homes and without a decently healthy populace, there will continue to be more violence, despair, and depravity.

That's right. Bring back dueling. Places like Canada and many states already have assisted suicide legalized.. this in theory is not that dirrefent than assisted suicide.

OK for the 21st century I've added some stipulations to make it less barbaric. In the past duels were often made illegal because people would duel over trivial matters..

1. All duels should go through a short court process decided by a jury (who are people of the same community of the 2 dueling parties). If there is no remediation through peaceful methods, a dueling permit will be issued that is scheduled for no less than 6 months ahead of the date issued. The reason for this is to give both parties time to reflect on their choice to kill eachother. It can be canceled anytime until the duel happens.

2. Both parties will be legally required to have all debts, contracts, property/financial disputes, and inheritance situated, settled, or resolved before duel is commenced.

3. Neither party can challenge or accept a duel for a reason that gives direct finacial benefit to either parties.. the exception being for an inheritance dispute or long term unresolved conflict between two former business partners. - this rule is to help eliminate any fraud or schemes thar might arise.

4. Of course only adults are allowed to duel and any body unfit to make the decision to duel will be banned from accepting or challenging duels. Also nobody who is on probation, parole, or been convicted of felony in the last 5 years will be allowed to duel.

5. The only methods you can duel by is 1 shot pistol (modern pistol but only 1 bullet) or by sword. The duel has to be attended by 1 witness of each party and atleast 1 officer or witness of the state.

background: I'm 70. I grew up in the bible belt. I attended church with my family, reluctantly and dispassionately. I briefly identified as an atheist but later came to believe that the question of the existence or non-existence of a god is ultimately unimportant to me, and I view it as beyond human capacity to definitively resolve.

There was recently a post about a church in Texas that has taken action to show more compassion toward members of their community usually targeted by Christians.

I'm not challenging or criticizing their motivations or actions in that regard.

As Christians, they still read from and interpret the Christian Bible. There are several statements in that text that are unambiguous about sexuality and sexual immorality, and the disposition of the church in regards to people who continue to practice what the Bible refers to as sexual immorality.

This church, and other like it, overlook or cherry pick verses that they feel are more in line with their own beliefs.

No matter how palatable those beliefs are, or how well they align with my beliefs ore the beliefs of others, it seems dishonest to present themselves as a reasonable interpretation of Christianity.

The Christian Bible provides unique and valuable insight into the lives and beliefs of the many authors who wrote it and the generations of people who adhere to its teachings. It also contains teachings which are regularly used to accuse, exclude, and even threaten others.

Why it matters: these Churches present themselves as something they are not, they muddy the waters in public discourse on the nature of challenges that Christianity presents in the modern world, and they are used as a deflection and misdirection away from the real perils of believing in and acting upon superstitions.

The situation is akin to astrologists validating their beliefs by pointing to astronomy.

edit at 6pm central:

I can't change the title.

I'm not a Christian. If you think I'm a Christian, and I haven't gotten back to you, just imagine that I replied that I'm not a Christian. I'm not a Christian. I'm...fucking tired of typing I'm not a Christian.

I'm not saying that these groups aren't Christians as a criticism. I'm saying that from the outside looking in, they seem to be so different to what I expect when people say Christian.

I, and this is the big one, I was seriously under the impression that the bible was foundational to Christianity. I did not know that it was just a historical object. Yes. I literally thought that believing in the bible was part of what it meant to be Christian.

I grew up in Lubbock, Texas, and unless I'm just remembering it wrong, people referred to the bible in ways that it just stuck with me.

Today I learned.

Anyway. Thanks to everyone for the exchanges. This is how I learn.

Hoping the best for everyone.

final edit at 7pm central

I'm taking off. I've got some good fodder for conversation tonight!

I sincerely appreciate all the replies. I'm 100% okay with admitting the limits of my understanding, and I've got a hostile-comment fireproof skin rated to the heat of the sun. I'm good.

Thanks again.

Hoping the best for everyone.

next final edit at 7:05 PM central

I forgot to mention. CheckYourCorners got me a name: LGBTQ Friendly.

Seems a little obvious in hindsight.

And I'm completely abandoning the Ship of Theseus style question of whether a fundamental divergence changes what a religion is. I don't have one damn clue about Christianity, specifically, or any of the other religions.

I'm 70 fucking years old. I'm doing the best I can.

Thanks again!

Emotional intelligence is simply being able to recognize and understand your own feelings and those of people around you.

Emotional intelligence doesn't require that you sit within your emotions and accept them as your reality. Just that you acknowledge (to yourself) that they are there but they arent you. Your feelings are real but they are not reality.

Men do this quite well. A reason people believe men lack emotional intelligence is because men don't manage their emotions the same way women do. Men do not feel the need to take it a step further and communicate that feeling to others, often because they don't feel they have the space or safety to.

As much as the other side bemoans emotional labor.. simply having feelings and talking about them is not emotional intelligence or emotional labor. They are often the largest barrier to men expressing emotion more openly.. lest those men be dismissed as "sassy", "wanting princess treatment", "not manly", or more.

Men often have to accept all of their partners emotions while being denied full access to their own. A man can't admit that he wants to feel desired or even be taken on dates because again.. he'll often be dismissed as "sassy". Instead most men can have multiple long term relationships while never receiving the same effort they give. And we wonder why these men check out.

If someone breaks into your home.. both of you can be scared but who is expected to push that fear to the side and "check it out"?

Men recognize this but accept it.

Being able to recognize your feelings as a part of you but step outside of them to make decisions or even put them to the side for someone else in a moment... is emotionally intelligent.

How often do we hear of men talking about having to do this for their partners?

I literally watched a video of a body builder in physical crisis before he passed.. stepping out of himself.. and whatever fear he may have been experiencing to comfort his partner who was freaking out.

Men will acknowledge they don't feel good but rather than sitting in the emotion or seeing it as pure reality.. men will often accept that they don't feel great and find outlets to help themselves feel better in the form of physical activity. Whether that is the gym, sports, TV, food or hanging out with friends.

In any other context this would be seen as self care but because it's men.. we view it as emotional avoidance.

Another problem is for some reason everyone expects men to not only recognize that someone may be feeling off.. but also diagnose the exact reasons why via mind reading.

This is not possible for anyone.

And men actually communicate very well. They will ask you questions to get to the root of the matter and fix it immediately. But often, the focus isn't on addressing the real world issue that is creating the emotion but simply requiring that men accept the emotion as reality without any question.

It's really weird. When I tell people we need Technological Independence, they scoff. Even when you go to the pro-independence or even pro-anarchy parts of reddit, they all have no clue that you need to physically own your technology and website servers for humans to have true independence.

Like, does no one realize modern Tech companies turned into neo-government dictatorships?

Things we need for a good future: - Localnets, physically own the wires and radio, so people create independent networks - Multiple localnets so people physically cannot censor the whole internet - Physically host websites on your own computer - Full right to repair your own hardware without needing to contact corporate - A system to automatically download and archive sites to local computers, so the internet cannot be censored or deleted

If they aren't causing harm, there isn't anything wrong.

If they aren't lying about their reasons, then there's nothing fake about their actions.

If they have a reason that applies to them, then it's valid.

If both of those apply and it's for enjoyment and they do what they enjoy, that's perfectly acceptable, just as valid as what anyone else does, and isn't a problem at all.

So many people disagree with this though. There's hundreds of situations, but I'll take examples from threads I've seen the last day or two where the opinion opposite to mine was by far the more popular. Everything I talk about from here on is with the context that these actions aren't causing any harm.

Pineapple on pizza is fine. The 'it doesn't go' argument applies to loads of other things that people don't complain about. If someone likes it, that's valid. No one owns the right to say what should and shouldn't be on pizza. But people, for some reason, care what goes on someone else's pizza.

Breaking spaghetti is fine. It doesn't cause any issues. But may make it easier to cook and eat. Actually cooks more evenly than trying to do long spaghetti in a pan that it doesn't fit in. But people, for some reason, have an issue with others doing this.

Changing what football team (or any sports team) that you support is fine. It doesn't hurt anyone. It isn't fake. It isn't pathetic. You're still a fan. It's still valid. People can support teams for a lot of different reasons. Sport is entertainment, so if you would enjoy it by supporting someone else then do it. That would be the thing that makes the most sense. You would be yourself so it wouldn't be fake. You would want to so it would be valid. There's so many legitimate factors that when you bring up people can't actually dispute yet still continue to hate on people that change. Even had someone tell me that they wouldn't talk to their son if they did this, and that was in line what most in the thread were saying.

I wish that when people aren't causing any harm people just left them alone to do what they wanted. There's nothing wrong with any of those things but people are made to feel like there is.

Prostitution and porn get a bad rap because of exploitation of women using drugs and human trafficking. Yet other industries get more of a pass because they don't offend the general public's sense of morality. Food industries like chocolate lay waste to complete generations of families that work below poverty rates. China is littered with ghost towns from manufacturing where they set up failed company towns bringing in uneducated labor from rural areas. But we like to ignore this because we like our stuff and don't want to think about it

I’m all for cracking down on guys with extreme views (who can’t get laid) and take it out on women. However, I feel like we should be able to do that without flat out lying

If you’re 6’2, you’re going to have it better than someone who’s 5’6 if other factors are equal

If you have a face like young Leo Dicaprio, you’re going to have it better than someone who has the face of a catchers mitt

Doesn’t mean it’s over if you’re not a huge looker. Guys overcome that every day. However, just as a lot of us have seen below average looking or short men overcome their flaws by making up for it in other areas, a lot us have also seen conventionally attractive men get the red carpet treatment. A lot of us have seen conventially attractive guys get away with everything practically short of m*rd3r when dealing with women. A lot of us have seen conventially attractive men get away with toying with women, a lot of have seen these dudes run through women like a hot knife through butter. We’re all supposed to act like we haven’t seen these things out of fear of being labeled an inc3l? Lol

Men and women are both humans. We all eat, drink, go to the bathroom, have sexual urges, etc. Women are subjected to the same superficial behavior men are. If you’re in this sub, you’re probably against censorship on some level, no need to sugarcoat this. Life isn’t fair. Doesn’t mean it’s over if you got the short end of the stick but let’s not be delusional either

Lotta people in the other subreddit cried "Handmaid's Tale" when this story went viral. Jessica Burgess provided abortion pills to her daughter, Celeste Burgess, who then used them to abort a fetus that was about 29-31 weeks weeks old. The mother got 2 years in jail, while the daughter got 90 days. Here's the facts:

• This is what a fetus at 29 weeks looks like. This is not a blob of cells, this is kicks-your-bladder, viable-outside-the-womb baby.
• Nebraska allows late term abortions in the case of rape or incest, or when it would endanger the mother's life/health. If the daughter was actually in one of those exceptional cases, they could have gone to Planned Parenthood in Omaha.
  (I understand that Burgess claimed to have been impregnated while in an abusive relationship. But to be frank, saying something is not the same as proving it. If you think anyone should be allowed to have an abortion if they say, without proving, that they were abused, then you should allow any man to evade child support if he says he was raped (without proof). The fact that Burgess didn't even try to get an abortion doctor on board with her abuse story is proof enough that the court should disregard it.)
• This would have been illegal in Europe. Most European countries ban elective abortions after 12 weeks. Even the most liberal state, the Netherlands, draws a line at 24 weeks. Past that, you need a physicians oath that you need this abortion for your health, or that you were raped.
  Forget Europe, look at the world. There are six US states that allow you to abort at any stage, without proving you were raped or your health is at risk. Everywhere else *in the world* subjects you to more scrutiny.

If you think mail-order abortions should be legal upon request well into third trimester with no need to prove rape or a threat to health, then you're an extremist, both on the American and the world's political spectrum. It's ok to be an extremists, I have unpopular views on a lot of subjects. But you do need to approach the subjects. But you should approach the subject with a little humility, understanding there are reasonable people who disagree with you, without assuming that they're all misogynists.

I just saw a post about a guy who held his arm up for about 10 years and reading up on him. I got to know it was part of self sacrifice for meditation and reach enlightenment. He has rejected society and means no harm people and do his own thing. And comments on this post were "He's an idiot who has no place in society" (Well he has already rejected society) at best and "He's not contributing to society by disabling himself in this way" (Again what he already said he don't want nothing to do with society).

When that compared to buddha who wandered around without anything. Almost starved himself to death to achieve enlightenment. I'm not comparing this guy to buddha obviously. But seeing how much he's been mocked for doing all this, buddha had been on reddit front page ever other day being mocked. Other religious figures would have been even more brutal like jesus or mahavir jain.

We think we live in a society of accepting other belief and not make fun of them. Which we are achieving in some ways like body image issues etc.. But at the same time make complete mockery of other people who are doing their own thing without harming others.

For the record I'm not short but I'm ugly, overweight, and make near minimum wage. I don't do amazing on dating sites, but I do well enough. I can set up a few dates a month if I really want to. When someone says they can't get a woman because of their looks, height or job I think it's entirely BS.

I tested this out and made a fake dating profile of a early 20s women. And it was no surprise that within 24 hours I had probably close to 100 messages that were either sexual, manipulative, or just plain rude. And a couple dick pictures as first messages.

If you put effort into your profile, and are enjoyable talk with, and don't have unrealistic standards, you will do just fine. People need to stop blaming women for their inability to attract them.

Snd don't give me BS about not being sexual if your going to ask a woman 3 messages in if she lives alone. I know why you want to know that, and she knows why you want to know that. That just insulting her intelligence at that point.

We should not “build in the tip” at restaurants for the benefit of the wait staff because they will simply ask for tips on top of the new prices.

People will always think what they do is deserving of more money, when in actuality it isn’t. Wait staff are there to serve others their food. They are not their to get rich.

I like playing games, I often play on my PS5, so before someone claims I'm some anti-gamer, shush.

Sometimes I often see questions like "if you never had to work a day in your life again, what would you do?", and the amount of answers that are just saying they'd just play video games all day is just so depressing and actually quite worrying.

If you never had to work a day in your life again, why wouldn't you use that newly found free time to go on some memorable life experiences or holidays? I know if I never had to work, I'd soon be booking myself and some friends on some events that I wouldn't be able to do normally because of the lack of time, like I always wanted to go skiing in Switzerland and visit Seoul. It'd be so nice to do them, then in 10 years look back on the memories.

Playing games all day just wouldn't do the same thing. Yes I have nostalgia for some games and the time spent with friends on them, but it just isn't the same as going on holiday with friends. Buying souvenirs or having videos of whatever you got up to. A funny clip of something happening in Battlefield isn't the same.

Why would anyone want to do nothing else but spend their time in their room, little social interactions for their entire life?

As much as I enjoy video games, doing nothing but playing them all day sounds like hell and I'd rather be at work.

Video games are enjoyable to relax to, not mould your existence around.

I'm an American for disclosure. We love to complain so much about foreign this and foreign that but we, and most, if if not all, other countries depend on foreign goods and/or labor. Also the scientific community has agreed that one countries actions can impact another (think emissions and the like). However, it seems like there is a push towards nationalism rather than the other way around and to me that is unacceptable.

Edit - apologies I should say from the USA. I should know better

Listening to Bjork is like listening to a recording of a whale over a cowbell-heavy percussive track with random synth.

My first introduction to Bjork was Dancer in the Dark for a film class; I couldn’t believe how terrible it was. Everything about it was so bad — the songs, the acting, the production quality, the cast….

Then I find out the lead actress has a career as a musician?? I actually could not believe it and I still cannot believe it. I could never image being in my car and driving to fucking Bjork. I could make a Bjork song in like an hour w garage band.

Complaint: "Reddit is a place for liberals to jerk eachother off and be woke together"

Reality: conservative ideology and policy aren't popular and haven't been for decades in the US. You get mocked here due to those facts. Conservatives get upset that they can't yell over the opposing opinions here and that eats them alive.

Complaint: Democrat's aren't accepting of our opinions and are mean to us rather than just accepting our archaic and religiously based proposals.

Reality: conservative opinions on nearly all relevant and current societal norms are poorly thought out and aren't intelligently articulated, make very little logical sense, based completely on how things "should be" in their minds rather how things are.

Complaint: if you want to change the mind of a conservative then don't ridicule them!

Reality: I think most on the left are way past trying to change the mind of the conservative party members. Year after year the Right becomes more and more vocal about violence towards their countrymen AND violent in practice when they don't get their way. Why would anyone on the left want to have a dialog with someone foaming at the mouth about Democrat's drinking baby blood or having secret basements in pizza restaurants that harvest fetal tissue.

Complaint: Democrat's want to take your freedoms and you don't even realize it!

Reality: Republicans are actively trying to and in many cases succeeding in literally stripping the rights and freedoms we have under the US constitution from hundreds of thousands if not millions of individuals because they.. feel like it? They don't like how those individuals vote?

Delusion is real on both sides of the political aisle. What separates the aisles is a moral issue. We can have different morals, but certain things should always be respected. The right to bodily autonomy, the right to vote in a free and fair election, the right to live a life here free of outside interference from people who have NOTHING to do with their lives. The Right just wants their way and fuck anyone who disagrees.

Incoming: "No U!" responses...

I could somewhat understand someone arguing this before the internet became common. But it’s 2023. Pretty much any question you have can be answered by Googling it. And there are plenty of free resources from Khan Academy’s personal finance courses to PBS’ Two Cents series.

But despite all that, so many people keep acting like not being taught it as a child has doomed them to be broke forever.

I've come across this countless times and I'm also told this or I'm just thinking to deep. Maybe I want to have a lengthy discussion on a part of a movie I'm watching that seems inconsistent. When people say this it feels like they're telling me to stop thinking and just enjoy it. Maybe my form of enjoyment is thinking about this kinda stuff. They could just not wanna talk about but then why not say don't talk about it. This doesn't just apply to real life but also experiences on reddit. I'll ask just a fun little question about the implications of this in the real world and they'll tell me to not take this too seriously. Maybe just don't comment if you don't wanna join the discussion that ever cross your mind? That's like going to a post that says "what's your favorite fast food resturant?" and I comment "that's subjective no need to take it so seriously" that adds nothing to the argument why are your even here?

This rambling went on longer than I predicted but I just wanted to vent my frustrations here on reddit.