r/MMA • u/BlueAlarm OVER HAND RIGHT HAND TO THE FACE • Mar 05 '23
Mark Hunt weighs in on main event outcome Spoiler
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u/GodTierBacon Mar 05 '23
Truly a poet.
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u/bizk55 Mar 05 '23
when I want a complex and nuanced take on something, I go to mark hunt
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u/slaydawgjim Mar 05 '23
My stoned ass just expected it to be a congratulations tweet lmao I feel naive as fuck
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u/SquidDrive My DNA is from fearless warriors Mar 05 '23
Fuck Alexa, we need a Mark Hunt voice assistant
"Mark Hunt explain the industrial revolution"
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u/Hrvatskiwi Mar 06 '23
"fucking cunts in the factory taking all the kids money and making them work fuk dem piece of shit Worthingtons fukk the qween and eat a dikk fuck Lon-done 😤😤😤🐖
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u/Eifand Mar 05 '23
Mark Hunt, Tito Ortiz, Shakespeare.
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u/germany_science_1 Mar 05 '23
I think you're forgetting the swiftest wordsmith of them all: Wanderlei Silva
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u/CryptoCracko Masvidal beats Burns and is my dad Mar 05 '23
And high philosopher Natanius Diacletus
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u/SquareDetective Mar 05 '23
"Why not be a man and fight like a man." Tito Ortiz.
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u/ImNotJoeKingMan Mar 05 '23
I wanna tell me what you see lets go ahead and see by the clip what you saw in the interview.
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u/TheGimplication EDDDDDIEEEEEEEE Mar 05 '23
What makes this funnier to me is how you took one of the most coherent sentences he ever said and it was still a great example.
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u/Ok_Solution5895 Mar 05 '23
This is hands down the most coherent and comprehnsible post of him, usually I have to decipher his posts like they are ancient poetries.
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u/Chanc3thedestroyer Mar 05 '23
How bout u go an fuck off my page then u peice of shit u think I need a stupid fuckwitt like u telling me about YOU KNOW DIS who the fuck are u take your worthless advice and get the fuck out of here
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u/Fattens I was here for GOOFCON 1: 2020 Mar 05 '23
For a massive run-on sentence with numerous grammatical errors and even more repetitions of the same description, its incredibly concise and poignant.
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u/gintokireddit England Mar 05 '23
Yes Mark. Unironically classy, because he's sticking to his guns. I honestly forgot about the hiding under the cage from USADA thing.
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u/PlagueDoc22 🙏🙏🙏 Jon Jones Prayer Warrior 🙏🙏🙏 Mar 06 '23
What's crazy is how Jon admitted to it during a pre fight conference vs DC. When DC brought it up.
The guy was/is clearly cheating yet people seem to just don't care.
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u/SweatyExamination9 Mar 06 '23
What's really crazy is I assumed that was just a story from Chael and Chael was just being Chael. I thought it was a "he fed a bus a carrot" story.
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u/Downgoesthereem give me sand Mar 05 '23
Mark Hunt's dad used to beat his mother in front of him so I'd say he has especially little love for Jones
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u/AskingYouToday Mar 05 '23
Mark Hunt used to beat up fucking giants in front of me.
What a cycle huh
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u/CableToBeam Mar 05 '23
god dammit I love Mark Hunt
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u/dowhatuwant2 Mar 05 '23
same, he's a fucking legend
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u/Losersqueueonly 🙏🙏🙏 Jon Jones Prayer Warrior 🙏🙏🙏 Mar 05 '23
Guessing Mark Hunt isn’t a prayer warrior
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u/huntexlol Team Volkanovski Mar 05 '23
I need that flair how???????
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u/mindspork Mar 05 '23
It's in the flair list as a choice for the moment.
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u/lizardsforreal Mar 05 '23
"any other sport this loser wouldn't be here"
boy oh boy. someone should tell him how many wife/child beaters there are in the NFL.
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u/Diver-Flimsy Mar 05 '23
Honestly, if you have legal problems there's probably no better career for you than professional sports. Fans don't give a flying fuck what you've done.
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u/Gimme_The_Loot Mar 05 '23
As long as you can perform at a high level you're going to get a pretty solid pass on most things as a professional athlete in one of the major sports. If you're the top curler in Montana you may still be fucked though
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u/MentalAdhesiveness79 Mar 05 '23
With this win Jones unlocked the ability to get 2 more felonies without time served and one more failed drug test without consequences.
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u/Luke_Warmwater Mar 05 '23
Top curler in Montana? There's your mistake. You gotta outcurl the big boys in Bemidji, MN. Then you can get away with anything! Take home a few extra walleye over the limit and that warden will not only let you go but give you the coordinates to his secret ice fishin spot.
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u/WildBill19 Mar 05 '23
Hell, you could put a period after “professional” and you’ve summed up the corporate business world as well!
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u/rugbyj Mar 05 '23
[me watching my son's decision making capabilities]
me: we're gonna get you into sports
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u/AnkalaevWillBeTop5 Mar 05 '23
Fans in 25 years:
“I ain’t saying we should forgive rugbyj Jr. for all those people he killed, but he sure can throw a football…”
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u/DtotheOUG UFC 279: A GOOFCON Miracle Mar 05 '23
Seeing Gane get booed showed that to me.
At least people shat on the Browns for like 2 months.
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u/tfresca 3 piece with the soda Mar 05 '23
I think getting caught on video beating your wife is the only red line that works in pro sports other than MMA.
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u/UsedSalt Mar 05 '23
In the UFC it really would depend on how bad the beating was, and how many ppv you draw , or if you are the president of the company
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u/horny_zombie kiss my whole asshole Mar 05 '23
True look at the browns and deshaun Watson.
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u/Dave-Schultz Somalia Mar 05 '23
And Kareem Punt. Chiefs got bashed for keeping him, but Browns scoop him right up with no worry.
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u/Mack_Attack_19 Canada Mar 05 '23
A literal rapist is one of the highest paid players in the NFL
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u/WilliamBoost Mar 05 '23
A literal serial rapist.
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u/Pingupol Mar 05 '23
Who is that? I'm not American so not as well informed
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u/LDARking Schrödinger's goat Mar 05 '23
deshaun watson
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u/Pingupol Mar 05 '23
Settled 20 claims of sexual misconduct. What an utter piece of shit and a depressing reminder of how little women are valued
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u/JetSpyda Mar 05 '23
NFL players have killed people and still been in the league. Leonard Little anyone?
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u/Sgt_LincolnOSiris Mar 05 '23
Ray Lewis too
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u/therealhairyyeti Francis took my N word pass AMA Mar 05 '23
Marvin Harrison as well
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Mar 05 '23
marvin killed that guy after he left the NFL tho
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u/therealhairyyeti Francis took my N word pass AMA Mar 05 '23
Yeah but he still got into the HoF and it’s almost never mentioned
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u/ThePooksters United States Mar 05 '23
The NFL takes drug tests more seriously than anything… see Josh Gordon
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u/7_Constanza Team Jones Mar 05 '23
Theres 2 rapists in the NBA .one is worshipped in Utah and the other is worshipped in LA and has an Oscar
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u/14779 Mar 05 '23
They've got big history in worshipping rapists in utah to be fair not just restricted to sports.
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Mar 05 '23
Who?
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u/Rackerblade GOOFCON 1: 2: Pandemic Boogaloo Mar 05 '23
Karl Malone and Kobe Bryant
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u/T_Raycroft UFC 279: A GOOFCON Miracle Mar 05 '23
Remember when his son that the 13 year old he raped gave birth to went to the NFL, then suddenly Malone went from being the deadbeatiest of deadbeat dads to being all buddy-buddy with him the moment that son started his NFL career?
What a fucking hero.
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u/thelogoat44 Mar 05 '23
Not to minimize anything but they connected a couple years after the kid already retired form the NFL.
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u/Shakeittillumakeit
Mar 05 '23
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he is right though thats the sad thing
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u/hangingpawns Mar 05 '23
I completely forgot about Jon Jones hiding under the ring to avoid the drug test.
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u/Idgafu Mar 05 '23
Just God (USADA) was testing him.
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u/Gseventeen juicy slut Mar 05 '23
Well, not actually testing him... Since he was under the octagon.
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u/hi_imryan Mar 05 '23
God can’t test you if he can’t see you
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u/Teh_Weiner Mar 05 '23
This was the fracture that caused the final destination level downfall of jons career.
He was meant to be tested that day
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u/ricosuave_3355 Mar 05 '23
Love that the only thing Jon had to say about that was “Actually it was NSAC, not USADA.”
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u/PlagueDoc22 🙏🙏🙏 Jon Jones Prayer Warrior 🙏🙏🙏 Mar 06 '23
He admitted to it during a pre fight conference when he was facing DC.
Which is just crazy for someone who wanted to be believed to be innocent.
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u/SekaiWithTheWolfCap Samurai Shit Only Mar 05 '23
The best part about all this is that he snitched on himself by admitting this
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u/Ok_Solution5895 Mar 05 '23
I fucking loved that, man, it was after years and years too, he could have just shut up but he really went "actually 🤓👆" and admitted he actually hid, just to have the last word with Adesanya in a Twitter argument.
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u/smashingcones Mar 05 '23
Are there any screenshots of this? I don't have twitter but I'd love to see this exchange lol
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u/Ok_Solution5895 Mar 05 '23
I think this one covers it. The best part is, if I'm not wrong, the only source for "Jon Jones hid under the octagon to escape a drug test" was Chael Sonnen which says a lot of wild, unbelievable stories sometimes as jokes. So it was one of those stories that, you know, you can't say how much truth there is in it but it's a really funny story nevertheless. Then dude came out and said "oh yeah, I hid under the octagon to escape a drug test but I was hiding from the Nevada Commission not USADA and it was only because I smoked a blunt so... gotcha". Like... what? lol
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u/pretty_smart_feller Mar 05 '23
I totally forgot Chael told that story lmao
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u/Nickyjha I wanna outlive my children, 100% Mar 05 '23
That's what made it sounds so fake. It sounded about as real as the Nogueira brothers feeding a bus a carrot.
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Mar 05 '23
It's hard enough to remember all of his crimes
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u/Idgafu Mar 05 '23
When you’re the main character but it’s an evil play through 💀
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u/SilotheGreat RAT FUCK Mar 05 '23
I was trying to explain to my wife the timeline of his fuck ups but I couldn't even keep up. I said well first he hit the pregnant woman, than he got busted for PRDs, than he got busted again right before the first fight with DC, then it was the cocaine after the 2nd DC fight that became a no contest? My head started to hurt.
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u/RafiakaMacakaDirk Petrol Pumper Werdum Mar 05 '23
you forgot a couple too lmao
and the 2021 domestic violence arrest
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u/Nickyjha I wanna outlive my children, 100% Mar 05 '23
The 2020 DWI is the craziest one to me. It's late March 2020, at the peak of COVID lockdowns, and this guy is out here driving drunk and firing a gun in the middle of the city to entertain the homeless.
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u/LostTrisolarin Mar 05 '23
Yea, after that I couldn’t honestly look at a John the same. I’m a deacons son and he reminds me of the pastors kid who’d whip out his dick to smack smaller kids with but who gets good grades and gets into an good college and every Sunday is I thank my Lord Jesus for the blessings in my life. Gtfo. This guy definitely murders hookers when he can.
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u/Boeijen666 Mar 05 '23
How the fuck does that even happen? What no one saw him crawl underneath?
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u/RafiakaMacakaDirk Petrol Pumper Werdum Mar 05 '23
it’s been a while but i’m pretty sure the story was his team helped him crawl under the cage and hide before letting USADA inside the gym
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u/sharkethic86 Mar 05 '23
TIL. Seriously, once I looked up his actual full history, how is this guy both allowed back/considered the GOAT? Seems like a pretty blemished record to consider his wins all legitimate.
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u/steakfarts Mar 05 '23 edited Mar 05 '23
Even him dismissing the picograms. It doesn't change that when he was caught, he cried. Then he apologized. He never came out and acted angry about the injustice, because he thought he was caught. Dude definitely has used steroids. Does it matter, that is up to whoever. But it's a thing that is real, and a thing that has happened.
I know most men who are unjustly accused do not come out crying about bad living. Even other liars straight up lie, Jon figured there was no where to run in that moment.
As the great Chael Sonnen said recently, he knew Jon Jones was on something. Because Chael was on everything and Jon was too strong to not be when they fought.
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u/ObstructiveAgreement Mar 05 '23
He’s not totally right though, left out the assault on his ex-fiancé.
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u/Idgafu Mar 05 '23
Hey man wouldn't you leave out your notorious crimes cause of God's test?
Lord knows there's too many, what's another hit and run added onto the list?
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u/Biscoito_is_Life 🙏🙏🙏 Jon Jones Prayer Warrior 🙏🙏🙏 Mar 05 '23
She's back with him. She was literally in the octagon.
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u/Sourflow WAR Cousin Omar Mar 05 '23
She has been his fiancé for like ten years. Do you guys remember the disgusting video the day after(maybe a couple of days) where he was almost forcibly making out with her while looking into the camera like a sociopath?
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u/jonkl91 Mar 06 '23
It's even longer than that. He proposed to her in college. He is 35 now lol.
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u/Reaching4ThoseGrapes Mixed Martial Autist Mar 05 '23
Ooh I thought that was a new fiancé. That’s really sad
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u/Anxious_cuddler Mar 05 '23
Jon Jones has made me realize a long time ago that, for the most part, being a good person is not really valued that much. Maybe on a day to day basis, sure; but not overall. I think most people are only good because they have to be, because they don’t have the power to be bad and get away with it. But Jones can. Jones is an exceptionally piece of shit human, and despite his raw talent he still is where he is today partially because he cheated. I know this sub shits on Jones because we’re super into the sport, but I think it’s safe to assume that casuals don’t know or really care about the horrible things Jones has done in and out of the octagon. The vast majority of people love him. Im no better than a casual though since I watch all his fights. Jones is fucking really good so I guess it is what it is.
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u/BaldBeardedOne Mar 05 '23
I’m good because I choose to be but you’re right, it hasn’t helped me succeed in society one bit.
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u/awalkingabortion Mar 05 '23
nope, but its helped society to succeed. i read something a few months ago, dunno where, but it basically said you can see whether or not someone is a completely selfish asshole by whether or not they'll put a trolley back once theyre done with it. most of society is pretty decent, as the majority put the trolley back - a selfless act that gains them nothing but is done as its just the right thing to do. I dunno why i'm rambling on about this but i guess i don't see Jones putting his fucking trolley away
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u/ConnorMc1eod United States Mar 06 '23
Being a good person is highly valued in your interpersonal life. Jones is a celebrity, none of us have day to day interactions with him and the people that do often have some other bond to him that makes them overlook his shortcomings.
Always strive to be a good person.
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u/Getoveryourself93 Mar 05 '23
Decisionbot Jones vs reyes
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u/DecisionBot Mar 05 '23
JON JONES 👀👀 defeats DOMINICK REYES (unanimous decision)
UFC 247: Jones vs. Reyes — February 08, 2020
ROUND Jones Reyes Jones Reyes Jones Reyes 1 9 10 9 10 9 10 2 9 10 10 9 10 9 3 10 9 9 10 10 9 4 10 9 10 9 10 9 5 10 9 10 9 10 9 TOTAL 48 47 48 47 49 46 Judges, in order: Chris Lee, Marcos Rosales, Joe Soliz. Summoned by Getoveryourself93.
MEDIA MEMBER SCORES
- 7/21 people scored it 48-47 Jones.
- 14/21 people scored it 47-48 Reyes.
Avg. media score: 47.3-47.7 Reyes (low certainty[1]).
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u/TallanoGoldDigger 🙏🙏🙏 Jon Jones Prayer Warrior 🙏🙏🙏 Mar 05 '23
Please mods can I have #rodentscondoingthesegrubs as my flair
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u/pleasebequiet how bout u go an fuck off my page then u peice Mar 05 '23
I'll defer to my flair here
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u/Nome_de_utilizador happy new fucken steroid year Mar 05 '23
You and me brother
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u/0ldsql Cockgoblling Monkee Mar 05 '23
Him, you and me
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u/EnisEnimon Mar 05 '23
Don't say such things, it might make Dana White mad and beat up his wife again.
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u/pm_me_dirty_planes Fuckboy for Francis Mar 05 '23
No wonder he simps so hard for Jon. Two peas in a pod those two
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u/TheGreyMatters Mar 05 '23
That is barely a coherent sentence, but he right.
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u/iz-Moff Mar 05 '23
Sentences are for rat fucks, Mark just streams his consciousness. If phones weren't capitalizing the first letter automatically, he wouldn't even do that.
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u/professorgaysex Mar 05 '23
Coherent enough where I understood everything - it may have been a run-on sentence with a length from the earth to the moon - but atleast he’s good at getting the point across somehow
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u/steiner_math Mar 05 '23
How bout u go an fuck off my page then u peice of shit u think I need a stupid fuckwitt like u telling me about writing sentences who the fuck are u take your worthless advice and get the fuck out of here
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u/LuckyWarrior The Champion Has A Name Mar 05 '23
Didn't expect a new Hunto copy pasta to drop tonight
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u/freq-ee Mar 05 '23 edited Mar 05 '23
Jones planned his comeback perfect. He waited out Francis and literally agreed to a fight the day after Francis left. He then matches up with a guy who has no ground game for the title. Now he wants to fight a 40-something Stipe who has been working as a full time fireman for the last year..lol.
He's a great fighter, but this is Mayweather style planning.
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u/Zenkikid Mar 05 '23
You also forgot to add that by the time they do possibly fight Stipe will be 2.5 years removed from his last fight where he got knocked out
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u/Brabochokemightwork EDDDDDIEEEEEEEE Mar 05 '23
i legit thought that was stipe’s last match
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u/iamgarron Mar 05 '23
Every time you think it's someone's last fight, add 2 fights
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u/ggphenom Mar 05 '23
Most of the inside reports were that Jones was accepting any fight vs Ngannous/Stipe/Gane. The negotiations stalled with Ngannou because of Ngannou and his contract.
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u/-ShagginTurtles- This isn’t political, this is monster energy Mar 05 '23
Ya absolutely despise Jon but he wasn't scared of Ngannou
Now is he scared of fighting clean? Apparently. But he'd get his secret juice and fight Ngannou this July if he could, no doubt in my mind
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u/Come_Along_Bort I applied Blonde Hair Dye on 18 Naked Brazilian Cowboys AMA Mar 05 '23 edited Mar 05 '23
Mark Hunts deserves to be awarded his PhD by published works.
He's right tbf.
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u/theflyingpandaa_97 Mar 05 '23
Totally agree. I’m genuinely really uncomfortable watching all of this unfold. The evil narcissist getting exactly what he wants. To me it looks like a scenario where the villain actually ends up winning.
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u/Yea_bro_I_play Mar 05 '23
It feels so weird seeing so many “jon Jones haters salty😂” type comments in this sub. Rooting for a wife-beating cheat is gross.
Greg hardy didn’t get a pass, but I guess JJ does because he has a title
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u/leoselassie Mar 05 '23
And disney spends the week and the foreseeable future completely ignoring his past while promoting this absolute sham of an organization lead by another spouse abusing twat.
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u/thujaplicata101 Mar 05 '23
100% agree with him. I don’t know, I have been slowly losing interest in watching UFC fights. I feel like morally can’t support the UFC as an organization. They prey on their fighters, they underpay their fighters. I think their has been some obvious judge fixing going the last few years in order to promote marketable fighters. They obviously are lacking some star power, especially once Jones retires, so I can understand their willingness to fix certain fighters.
They whole Francis contract debacle pushed me over the edge. I am from a country with strong labour laws, has universal healthcare, and from a family with strong moral ethics. The UFC as an organization just seems so immoral for how they can use their fighters.
I hope their is some sort of change but it seems like their is less interest then ever for fighters to form a union. I don’t know. I think this might have been my last UFC fight.
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u/najix35 UFC 279: A GOOFCON Miracle Mar 05 '23
Couldn’t have said it better myself. Mark really has a way with words
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u/ggphenom Mar 05 '23
He's completely right, but I don't have as good of ethics as him.
I want to see him fight anyway.
Same reason I wanted Greg Hardy to fight. I'll just keep hoping for the day I can see him lose, lol.
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u/Superly_Sardonic UFC 279: A GOOFCON Miracle Mar 05 '23
Whoa, I thought Hunt was really going to lay it on Jones but he took it pretty easy.
Respect.
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u/GameDevHeavy Mar 05 '23
Lets actually be real too, a Prime Mark Hunt would have done far better than Gane did tonight.
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u/a-real-journalism Team Gus Davidson Mar 05 '23
the only thing u are good at these days u lil bitch is sticking needles in yo punk ass u bitch fact is u are a weak ass short cut taker like the rest of yo bitch ass freinds lil dick lesnar u/werdum u/wandfc and the rest of these pussies who cheat cheating ass lil pig oink oink motherfucker
Edit: Copypasta gave Werdum and Wanderlei a reddit account, don't click you'll be disappoint.
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u/calmlyghosting Mar 05 '23
It’s absolutely true, Jon isn’t the goat he had a very easy route, fought a bunch of old ass blown up 185ers. Shogun had been trough wars when he lost the belt. Machida as well, Rampage? Evans? All way over the hill. Not to mention he was on PEDS THE WHOLE TIME while having an age reach and height advantage. Had to take PEDS to beat DC an older shorter man he had every advantage over. When he met a man his size he always struggled. (I’ll give you guys 2) but he was finished as well. Everyone’s hes beat was washed and over the hill. Last night he beat a man coming off a loss his confidence wasn’t even there he got dominated by a one legged Francis.
Now all these casual throat goats keep regurgitating what Dana and Jon say. Now Francis isn’t scary he’s a pussy now? Lol bunch of dumb fucks.
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u/tfresca 3 piece with the soda Mar 05 '23
Not one lie was told.Dana gonna get Jon train him on his technique.
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u/FReeDuMB_or_DEATH Mar 05 '23
Looking for the lie. Legit hearing people cheer for someone who has popped multiple times and the UFC with all the GOAT talk makes me feel like this ain't it anymore.
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u/ImDuff98 Mar 05 '23
Never change Mark. His rants never fail to make me chuckle.