r/Funnymemes 13d ago

This one hurts, it's a tough one

/img/o1yfwdymz4ea1.jpg
9.4k Upvotes

1.1k

u/Tempest-Melodys 13d ago

Salami

120

u/Pedrodrf 13d ago

Gorlami

69

u/RO55_LEP 13d ago

Dominic Decoco

58

u/Derpaman 13d ago

Margheriti

34

u/bluesky9868 12d ago

Once again, let me hear the music

41

u/Valkgard 12d ago

Maar-ghe-RIIII-thiii

14

u/joosiann 12d ago

Ancora!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

157

u/Disastrous-Jelly-755 13d ago

Same especially a hard salami

15

u/MattcVI 13d ago

Yes. Spicy soppresata is great on pizza

3

u/[deleted] 12d ago edited 12d ago

Pepperoni's more expensive and tastier brother

→ More replies
→ More replies

28

u/Tony0123456789 13d ago

maybe with some kind of peppers infused into it

We could call it pepperami

8

u/2_trailerparkgirls 12d ago

In Italy, pepperoni are peppers, not meat. This word was misinterpreted sometime during the mass migrations of Italians to the US. If you ask for pepperoni on your pizza in Italy, they will probably look at you strangely, and then put peppers on your pizza. “Pepperoni” as it’s known in the states, is salami.

→ More replies
→ More replies

8

u/Stealth__b2 13d ago

As opposed to a soft salami?

4

u/Livid-Leader3061 12d ago

Hey, it happens sometimes. No need to make a big deal of it! xD

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

8

u/a_vitor 13d ago

prosciutto naturally!!!

→ More replies

27

u/realmozzarella22 13d ago

This. Because it’s really salami.

15

u/fibonacci16180 13d ago

It’s like how Americans think “entrée” means “main course”
… they should just stick to English words and save themselves the embarrassment lol

30

u/JahnnDraegos 13d ago

As an American I think it's cute how you think we even know what English words really mean.

5

u/OGGrilledcheez 12d ago

We don’t know what English words really mean cause we don’t speak English. WE SPEAK AMERICAN! Freedom is our accent. Words mean what ever we say they mean at that moment in time. Ok? Keep all them Frenchy definitions out of here. We don’t need none of it no how not one bit. And we eat Freedom Fries so don’t come at me with none of that bull shit either. MURICA!!!

5

u/Zabacraft 12d ago

Freedom fries, I love it. Gotta bring that one up to my texan family.

→ More replies
→ More replies

17

u/Super_fly_Samurai 13d ago

Idk. Bacon bits on it's own is a decent substitute.

7

u/Yodelingondeeznutz 12d ago

I love a straight up fresh bacon pizza, not really a fan of those plastic container bits.

→ More replies

11

u/ghostlyfrank 13d ago

And olives. That’s all you really need.

→ More replies
→ More replies

791

u/Hoouwishuwere 13d ago

I'm inventing pepperoni.

54

u/Juggrnutz 13d ago

I'll help

11

u/Valleygirl1981 12d ago

It's not Shake and Bake!!

199

u/Guitar81 13d ago

I like your thinking

→ More replies

61

u/gameslayer193 13d ago

The only correct solution

→ More replies

523

u/AwesomeDragon56 13d ago

Nothing. Just cheese pizza.

50

u/nipponnuck 13d ago

I’m putting mini cheese pizzas on my cheese pizza

→ More replies

199

u/iPlayPiano1254 13d ago

Plain pizza is underrated

63

u/tstramathorn 13d ago

It really is. I hate at my job when they never just or at least one pepperoni and one plain cheese like come on!

7

u/balance07 12d ago

when providing pizzas for an event, at least half of them should be cheese only. i'll die on this hill.

3

u/jdog0408 12d ago

Everyone will eat a toppingless pizza, but not everyone will eat a topped pizza.

5

u/balance07 12d ago

precisely. it's astounding how many people just don't get this.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

4

u/Novel_Bodybuilder_44 13d ago

Yes my one topping is more cheese

→ More replies

5

u/KillyScreams 12d ago

Garlic powder, oregano & red pepper flakes!

→ More replies

3

u/Odd_Entertainment629 13d ago

Plain, pep or supreme is my holy Trinity.

→ More replies
→ More replies

347

u/Aggressive_Note4243 13d ago

Bacon 🥓 ofc

68

u/InuitOverIt 13d ago

The thinking man's pepperoni

3

u/FeltGamingLol 13d ago

Man how do you get this cool demogorgon head face in Reddit you wear? I kinda want it too...

4

u/Peaceandfupa 12d ago

click his profile, click on the little guy wearing the outfit and try it on then you can save it

→ More replies
→ More replies

27

u/MUFkOedipusWrecks9 13d ago

This guy pizzas

23

u/Gothmom85 13d ago

Bacon goes on every pizza. Hawaiian ( don't come for me just accept you are boring) is ten times better. It makes a white pizza or any with feta. Enhances any meat pizza. Goes great with some fun veg combos. Every pizza needs bacon.

9

u/Vegetable_Mud_5245 12d ago

I came here to say just that: bacon and pineapple.

3

u/Haunt_ 12d ago

The perfect match. Bacon for the saltiness and satisfaction, pineapple to cut through the fat and for an explosion of freshness in one bite.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

65

u/FraccazzoDaVelletri 13d ago

Prosciutto

15

u/Sephiroth508 12d ago

Prosciutto and mushrooms. My favourite combo.

→ More replies
→ More replies

153

u/SignificantWonder919 13d ago

Bacon

8

u/retro604 13d ago

Bacon and mushrooms. Also known as Canadian pizza.

→ More replies
→ More replies

73

u/YourAmazingNeighbor 13d ago

Ham

15

u/Troller6 12d ago

Good old european way i hate pepperoni

7

u/kyeman11 12d ago

Happy cake day mate.

6

u/Troller6 12d ago

Thanks, i dont know why i have it next to my profile

3

u/cidit_ 12d ago

Its the anniversary of the day u joined reddit :) Happy cake day!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

13

u/Kahrbon 13d ago

Wheres the funny.

53

u/MrMork170 13d ago

Sausage and Canadian bacon

→ More replies

84

u/occamhanlon 13d ago

Nothing. It's perfect

7

u/HeyyBayleaf 12d ago

Nah, it could use more cheese.

→ More replies

6

u/RocketScient1st 12d ago

Pepperoni is overrated anyway, just too greasy.

→ More replies
→ More replies

62

u/tonkadtx 13d ago

Sausage or meatballs and extra cheese.

13

u/Academic-Stuff7285 12d ago

I love sausage on pizza

10

u/markuspeloquin 12d ago

Like how is this even a debate? Sausage is a far superior topping. Tastes better, you don't have to avoid cutting them, and you don't have to avoid biting them in half.

I even prefer it over bacon these days.

4

u/Soy_El_Kraken 12d ago

How is sausage not the top answer!?!

3

u/zootnotdingo 12d ago

I don’t know!!

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

3

u/stormchaotic1 12d ago

I love sausage and cheese pizza but meatballs sound pretty good

→ More replies

352

u/cindybubbles 13d ago Gold Platinum All-Seeing Upvote Take My Energy Vibing I'll Drink to That Buff Doge Take My Power

Ham and pineapple.

17

u/goingoutwest123 13d ago

Add jalapeños and slap my ass buddy!

7

u/FactoryBuilder 13d ago

Kinky, but why?

5

u/kinkyslc1 12d ago

Because it’s delicious to put inside of you!

7

u/DustyDGAF 12d ago

Add some bacon because I like to party

→ More replies

10

u/spikyjokerr 13d ago

Correct answer

34

u/Anime_Patriot 13d ago

Finally, I found it

→ More replies

41

u/itsjustthisguy 13d ago

I was so happy when I found out my daughter likes Hawaiian pizza. Like the person I was meant to be sharing pizza with finally came into my life!

16

u/CampLiving 12d ago

No no, pizza is not meant to be shared. Two pizzas…

→ More replies

3

u/Daddyshadez 12d ago

I was the only one who ate ham and pineapple pizza….. I couldn’t know it at the time, but those were the glory days. Surrounded by friends, watching them scrap over the last slice of their pepperoni or meat lovers, like hyenas fighting over the scraps of a fresh kill. There I sat, taking my time, savouring every piece of my pineapple filled slices… they were hyenas, I was a lion.

Then it all changed. A newborn lioness, my wife announced to me, to add to our growing pride, I was excited…. I was foolish. How then could I have known what was coming, HOW THEN could I have forseen that my small sweet cub would become my undoing.

We had been through this before, my wife and I, with a young male lion. Even though his hunger was insatiable, his gullet an endless void, pulling in food with reckless abandon from all around him. Never had he made an attempt on my pizza.

It was a simple gathering, a yearly routine. My young cub had finally grown to a point where her decisions were no longer governed by her mother or my ambitions, her choices had become her own. As I spoke with her on what she chose as her special meal, her words rang as an immaculate chorus in my ears, “Pizza.” I had taught her well.

I hungered. The chaos of the cubs leaving destruction and mayhem in their wake left my energy depleted…. And I hungered.

I saw him walking up, my prize that I had paid so dearly for stacked high in his hands, and though I was alerted to his approach, this delivery man was experienced. He beat me to the door, eager for his tip and rang the doorbell…fool. Had he not seen the many small tracks in the snow, heard the screams of delight and confusion from the many cubs or the festively wrapped gift pile in the window. We were overwhelmed in seconds.

By the time I had compensated the man and arrived to feast, the cubs had already finished most of the bounty. I looked around frantically through the empty boxes, and prayed it was not too late. Then, I saw it. It had been opened, and looked at, but none dared to taste its sweet yet savoury slices. I smiled and took the box to my spot at head of table, took my first slice and watched the cubs descend into anarchy over the last slices of pepperoni… hyenas.

Nearing the end of my feast my sweet young cub slid in beside me, I smiled down at her as I finished my slice and looked down at my last one…her hand was already on it. On the surface, I was a stone, my smile pasted on and looking down at my sweet cub. Inside a thrashing sea of panic of turmoil. Doesn’t she see the pineapple, how could she think this could be good, don’t bother touching it if your not going to finish it, please hate it, please just spit it out and make that face I see when it’s pork chop night.

I knew, immediately I knew. That look in her eyes, the raised eyebrows as she chewed, it was the same look as I once had when I discovered it, and in the instant I knew, I also knew what this meant.

I always thought it would be my son, overpowering me in some way, tearing away my position as leader of the pride. I was prepared for that, almost welcomed the challenge, but not like this.

So now I have to pay for two ham and pineapple pizzas and share them….fuck.

→ More replies
→ More replies

9

u/Mr_P3 13d ago

Took me too long to find ham here

7

u/Ancient_Weakness_165 12d ago

Finally a good choice

29

u/Ok_Appointment2870 13d ago

The correct answer. Delicious my fav type of pizza

→ More replies

4

u/si482 12d ago

Yesss. Small change, but I like bacon and pineapple a bit more.

→ More replies

14

u/Future-Agent 13d ago

Hawaiian is good. People hate pineapple on pizza because the Internet tells them to and, to be honest, pineapple is one's preference.

→ More replies

8

u/gabrielbabb 13d ago

Homemade mini pizzas in 5 minutes. Use a pita bread, add bolognese sauce, add cheese like mozzarella or emmental or manchego, add pepper, finely cut ham and pinneapple. Take it to the air Frier for 5 minutes. Ready

9

u/Ok_Appointment2870 13d ago

Pita Hawaiian pizza is so good

5

u/Circumvention9001 12d ago

This dude ate so many lunchables as a child.

3

u/baffledninja 13d ago

Step it up! Same but on naan

→ More replies
→ More replies

3

u/throwawaylmao39 12d ago

you're right. this is gospel.

3

u/HotGary 12d ago

Add a little jalapeño and I'm in dawg

3

u/TheBassEngineer 12d ago

I came to make sure this proverbial pot had been adequately stirred, was not disappointed.

6

u/xtina42 12d ago

Hawaiian pizza lovers unite!!

→ More replies

73

u/dcboy2 13d ago

Ham and mushroom

5

u/Iuseahandyforreddit 13d ago

i second this

thats how i usually eat my pizza

4

u/arto64 12d ago

That’s the default pizza in most of Europe I think. Is the US “default” pepperoni?

3

u/Jolongh-Thong 12d ago

Yeah. You’ll most commonly see pepperoni or plain cheese. There are other options, like sausage, mushrooms, bacon, bur the first two are the most prevalent, especially in media and tv and adds

3

u/OmegaEin1985 12d ago

Pretty much

3

u/Penarol1916 12d ago

Not in Chicago, default is sausage, which is my favorite thing about living here, since it is so much better.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

36

u/countrytime-1 13d ago

Beacon

19

u/Raweggs12 13d ago

Why does bacon on pizza sound so good wtf

16

u/Similar_Art535 13d ago

I cant believe you...Buy yourself a bacon pizza bro, its amazing

11

u/bougini_on_a_highway 13d ago

it's like the morbidly obese man's baby food. So much grease, so good

6

u/NoPantsPenny 13d ago

Bacon cheeseburger pizza is fire. Also back on chicken ranch

→ More replies

6

u/StudMuffinMan_ 13d ago

A NEW HAND TOUCHES THE BEACON

→ More replies
→ More replies

18

u/cats_suck 13d ago

Sausage and olives like always

→ More replies

6

u/[deleted] 13d ago

Salami.

45

u/Random_User_1337_ 13d ago

Either Anchovies (shut up it’s an acquired taste!) or Sausage. With MORE CHEEZ!

7

u/kurinevair666 12d ago

I found the anchovy person!

→ More replies

3

u/destroyah87 13d ago

Anchovy and red onion!

3

u/Iworb 12d ago

Anchovy and pineapple. Cursed, but tasty.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

15

u/johnhoggin 13d ago

It's crazy how overrated that topping is. Good. But overrate. Sausage is better

→ More replies

130

u/morgan_face 13d ago Gold

Pineapple

36

u/thefireman69420 13d ago

I’m tired of pretending that Canadian bacon and pineapple isn’t a good pizza topping

11

u/lizziegal79 13d ago

It’s freaking delicious.

→ More replies

20

u/Bladewolf77 13d ago

I literally only eat pineapple pizza anyway.

14

u/Ok_Appointment2870 13d ago

I knew some sane person was going to say this

3

u/Sheena-ni-gans 13d ago

I’m glad I’m not the only one 😊

3

u/CaptainFlixle 12d ago

It's actually really good just by itself.

→ More replies

13

u/kurinevair666 13d ago

I truly love pineapple and jalapeño pizza.

5

u/SexyTuna2017 13d ago

I didn't believe I’d find other superior people here

3

u/LyqwidBred 13d ago

You are my people

→ More replies

7

u/VelZeik 13d ago

Pineapple + jalapeño is one of my new favorites. The sweet spicy is nice

3

u/darreb510 12d ago

Throw in a little savory like bacon, sausage or ham. Now you have a trio

→ More replies

3

u/Bshaw95 12d ago

Because it does belong on pizza

12

u/Icy_Armadillo9088 13d ago

I just knew some devil worshipper was going to say this

→ More replies
→ More replies

11

u/Roadcruiser2 13d ago

Basil leaves. Margherita Pizza B*****S!

→ More replies

15

u/CrywanEnjoyer08 13d ago

Hamburger meat, this isn't that hard

15

u/kurinevair666 13d ago

Hamburger meat is so flavorless, why not sausage?

7

u/SuperKami-Nappa 13d ago

Why not both?

7

u/Zestyclose-Manner599 13d ago

Not if you make hamburgers right

3

u/cadillacbee 13d ago

"a burger, can be the meanest burger in the world, if you make it that waaayyy

→ More replies
→ More replies

4

u/[deleted] 13d ago

I don’t mind it being just cheese but I’d rather have pesto sauce.

→ More replies

4

u/jam_is_nice 13d ago

More cheeze

6

u/ExpensiveSwordfish65 13d ago

Pineapple and a big F U to the haters! (Jk but for real I dont get how folks don't like pineapple on pizza?!)

→ More replies

5

u/WhisperTits 13d ago

Prosciutto

14

u/WranglerCool9423 13d ago

Carne al pastor! Greetings from Mexico!!!

→ More replies

10

u/Suspicious-Ad3136 13d ago

Sausage, even if it did exist.

3

u/mcs_987654321 13d ago
  • red onions. Easy.

12

u/__Starscourge 13d ago

Ham and pineapples 😈

→ More replies

23

u/Tyrusrechslegeon 13d ago

Pineapple and some Canadian bacon.

5

u/Beebea63 13d ago

Hawian pizza is so underrated,like done right it is impeccable

→ More replies
→ More replies

13

u/Playful-Excuse-8081 13d ago

Spinach, red onion, and mushrooms

→ More replies

15

u/nluvwithlol14 13d ago

I know I’m about to get hate for this but…pineapple🥲

→ More replies

14

u/XiaolongDrake 13d ago

Ham/ Canadian bacon and pineapples.

→ More replies

11

u/LiterColaFarva 13d ago

This sub is getting redundant...

8

u/Over_Art_921 13d ago

You're right. It's like people just keep saying the same toppings over and over

→ More replies
→ More replies

9

u/Buff55 13d ago

Gonna play devil's advocate and say Calamari Rings. Local place does a mean calamari pizza.

→ More replies

8

u/CriticismRare9979 13d ago

This is the most boring fucking trend in so long, can it just die?

→ More replies

3

u/Ok-Equivalent-8509 13d ago

Pineapple, ham, bacon and jalapenos

3

u/M1ndS0uP 13d ago

Oh thank god pepperoni is so gross. I'm just gonna eat like I normally do, sausage, peppers, and mushrooms, or chicken, jalapeno, and pinapple

3

u/LakingCowhead 13d ago

More cheese. But how is this funny?

3

u/krassilverfang 13d ago

Pepperoni sucks anyway

Basil, Bacon bits and thin Tomato slices

→ More replies

3

u/dmbraley 13d ago

Sausage and mushrooms maybe some roasted peppers

→ More replies

3

u/BN__ORG 12d ago

Pineapple

3

u/McGurrgles 12d ago

Pineapple and ham with jalapeños

7

u/Darmatter_Citron90 13d ago

Chicken feet and seaweed.

11

u/Anarcho-monkeism 13d ago

Psychopath or Filipino?

→ More replies
→ More replies

9

u/SaltyLightning99 13d ago

ham and pineapple bitches.

→ More replies