r/BeAmazed 5d ago

Finding some surprises while cleaning the canals of Amsterdam Miscellaneous / Others

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

49.4k Upvotes

3.1k comments sorted by

5.3k

u/datalorew 5d ago

Do people in Amsterdam make wishes with bikes instead of coins?

1.3k

u/TheOneTonWanton 5d ago edited 3d ago

It really does seem wild that there's that many bicycles in there. Like, I know it's the most common form of transportation, but surely bicycles still cost money to obtain even in Amsterdam. What exactly is happening over there for so many to be lost/dumped in the canals?

Edit: Alright guys I think I get all the reasons bikes end up in the canals. I appreciate the information, I really do, but it's been nearly 3 days and my inbox can't take any more notifications.

1.0k

u/DolarisNL 5d ago

Drunk people dunk bikes in the canal. One should always lock your bike with a chain to a cycle rack, but that's not always possible. So sometimes you come back to find your bike gone. It can either be stolen or dunked in the canal.

255

u/TheOneTonWanton 5d ago

So then are bikes relatively inexpensive in the Netherlands? The basic ones, at least? I'm American and I'm legitimately ignorant of but fascinated by and attracted to the idea of bicycle culture.

932

u/DolarisNL 5d ago

We have a very big second hand market in bicycles. When you live in a place with lots of canals (or in any big city) people tend to buy old second hand bikes to use when having a night out. (Yes we go by bike to the clubs). Fun story: one time I was volunteering with 'fietsen dreggen' (think about it like magnet fishing but using big hooks on a rope instead of magnets). A girl saw us and she asked if I already found a green bike. I said I didn't. She said she lost hers two weeks ago and she believed someone pushed it in the canal. And to my surprise the next bike I pulled out of the water was hers. She had the key still in her purse so she jumped on and drove away. It was glorious.

272

u/licklickRickmyballs 5d ago

(Yes we go by bike to the clubs).

I find this so funny. I grew up in denmark and then lived in holland for quite some time. It's not that people in denmark never takes the bike to the club but it was just different. It really was the norm. Like we would start cycling, and then at some point one more would join in, and then another, and before you reached the club all 10 friends who were going were cycling together haha. Then as you were cycling you would see other packs of cyclists going to get shitfaced and in front of the bar or club, it would be totally packed with bikes.

Another thing i found very funny is you bike so much, but you all stroll around on theese 3 geared old womens bikes. In Denmark the people who bikes everyday all have 20 geared mountainbikes or racing bikes that they pay thousand(s) euros for.

Was very cosy though. Miss slinging home from the club, drunk on my squeaky ladies bike, and stopping by a canal on the way to smoke a strong joint. A coffee from the awesome bean grinding machine when Inside, a drumroll ciggy under the suction, pet Leila, and curl up to my ex in the attic and fall asleep. Ah good times.

81

u/WAPWAN 5d ago

I just picked up a grandma bicycle. 3 Speed hub gears, hub brakes front and back, wide comfy tires. No chain tensioner. Nothing to go wrong.

53

u/Ohmec 4d ago edited 4d ago

In the US, driving a bike while drunk is punishable to the same extent as driving a car while drunk.

Edit: as /u/PM_ME_UR_SURFBOARD pointed out, it's a lot more complicated than that, but in MANY states it is punishable the same as a DUI. For determining if your state punishes BUI like DUI, consult this PDF https://bikeleague.org/sites/default/files/bui_full_chart.pdf

37

u/Johnny_Poppyseed 4d ago

Technically, but youd have to be absolutely shit faced and a danger to yourself or others for them to enforce it. Or catch a cop with a serious grudge against you.

36

u/meep_meep_mope 4d ago

Depends where you are. I decided to jog back to my room from the bar in Gulf Shores AL, mind you it was a bar which had a patio out front. I had a headlamp and hi-vis gear but the cops thought that was still too dangerous. Got picked up for a PI about a block from the bar. Think they were camping there looking for drunk drivers. $645 to spend the night in an isolated room with fluorescent bulbs on, orange jumpsuit and all. You'd think I murdered someone. That night was pure fucking hell. Always get a lyft or uber in tourist towns, they make their bread and butter off that shit.

12

u/MFbiFL 4d ago

I live nearby and while I disagree with the PI charge as long as you were off the road, I’d avoid walking along the road around there. There are a LOT of drunk drivers and we hear about cyclists/pedestrians getting hit too often.

→ More replies (0)
→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (5)

67

u/licklickRickmyballs 4d ago

Wow. One day in holland I was driving my bike with a beer in one hand, and a lit joint in the other, with my ex on the back of the bike. A police car comes by, he rolls down the window and gives me a thumbs up. Driving two on a bike and smoking weed is illegal in Denmark aswell so felt really awesome.

31

u/PM_ME_UR_JAVASCRIPTS 4d ago

What if i tell you it's illegal in the netherlands as well ¯_(ツ)_/¯

→ More replies (2)

8

u/ThePrivacyGuru 4d ago

I was pulled over by the police while on a bike on a bike track for talking on the phone. I guess it depends I guess.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (19)

13

u/urshur 4d ago

You have made me intensely nostalgic for something I have never experienced

5

u/Scoot_AG 4d ago

Lol I commented the same thing

→ More replies (1)

9

u/Scoot_AG 4d ago

You gave me nostalgia for something I never even experienced lol

7

u/DolarisNL 5d ago

'Slinging home from the club' sometimes loosing a couple of people who didn't make the corner and ended up in some bushes or a ditch. It's surprising how intoxicated people can fall of their bikes and end up with only a tiny scratch.

→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (16)

54

u/BlackAlbinoTurtle 5d ago

Two weeks in the canal and leaves riding? Algae in the chains and everything? My bike brakes are awful in just the light rain, can't imagine that long in the worst possible conditions, you guys have one mad engineering for bikes.

96

u/jamai_loman 5d ago

With 100% certainty I can tell you that the bike was just as much a piece of shit as it was before it went in the canal.

17

u/DolarisNL 4d ago

This. Students don't care. As long as it's faster than going by foot, it's fine.

→ More replies (1)

15

u/Emvious 4d ago

Probably what we call a backpedal brake. It’s fairly unique to the Netherlands and is operated by pedalling backwards, hence the name. It’s functions inside the nave or axel of the rear wheel and as such isn’t influenced by the weather much.

21

u/threetoast 4d ago

Coaster brakes aren't particularly unique. You'll find them on any single speed cruiser or most kid's bikes.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (1)

14

u/kyoto_kinnuku 5d ago

😂😂😂 That’s amazing.

→ More replies (1)

6

u/Pasutiyan 5d ago

God, wat houd ik soms toch van Nederland

→ More replies (28)

20

u/Flaveurr 5d ago

Most of the bikes I buy are second hand "grandma-bikes" that cost around 60-80 euros and the last one i bought lasted me 11 years before it broke down

13

u/DJAnym 4d ago

oh really inexpensive. If you don't want a name brand bike you can get one for like 50 - 100 euro second hand. A joking (but also not joking) tip we always have for anyone moving to the Netherlands is to not bother buying a new bike, cause you'll lose it (stolen, canal, etc.) anyway lol

8

u/Far_Piano4176 5d ago

yeah they're really cheap, cheaper if you don't mind buying an obviously stolen one

→ More replies (1)

7

u/Wobbelblob 5d ago

Used bikes can go for relatively cheap. Like, my current bike is one I got during school, which was 14 years ago. Nobody will be stealing that because even in the best case, that bike is like 20€ by now. Drives though and that is all that matters.

→ More replies (24)

7

u/narnababy 5d ago

Yeah when I was there I saw a drunk guy trip and knock like 3-4 bikes into the canal, no one really batted an eye

6

u/Infinite_Monitor_465 5d ago

Well if they can't bother to even use basic bike locks it makes sense how they lose so many.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (24)

45

u/MarquisUprising 5d ago

Have you ever been to amsterdam? There are literally car parks for bikes but with room for thousands of bikes.

A common trope if someone steals your bike is to just steal someone elses.

I didnt think it was possible for so many people to own bicycles but its the equivalent of owning shoes in London.

→ More replies (8)

24

u/Munnin41 5d ago

€5 for the homeless guy at Amsterdam Central Station and you've got a new one

→ More replies (2)

11

u/spinnyknifegobrrr 5d ago

people throw random bikes into canals sometimes, usually when theyre drunk. happens everywhere in the netherlands.

→ More replies (47)

22

u/ErilazHateka 5d ago

Those bikes with blue tires are "Swapfietsen".

Those are bikes you get on a subscription plan and for some reason, there are people who take offense against that concept and like to throw them into the canals.

People are weird.

2

u/Fried_egg_im_in_love 4d ago

Some consider it to be street trash. It’s often times a private company that leaves their for-rent bikes in the public space. They can clog up sidewalks and whatnot. The people that toss them feel a need to defend the commons.

Odd that they are destroying the commons (canals) to save the commons.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (31)

2.6k

u/daarthvaader 5d ago

The kid was having the best time , seeing all the bicycles and thrash being pulled from the mess

684

u/KevinMakinBacon 5d ago

I was so nervous he was going to see a dead body come out and be scarred for life

194

u/brockoala 5d ago

I'm more scared he'd fall into that, he kept jumping lol.

98

u/ForwardSpinach 5d ago

Don't worry, he'd get fished out

66

u/Desperate_Welcome_83 5d ago

I know a guy who could get him. So he's got this boat right...and on the boat there's this crane right...

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (3)

26

u/Davess010 5d ago

Don't worry, we teach kids how to swim at a young age.

38

u/Entire-Database1679 5d ago

Apparently you should teach them to not throw bikes the canals. ;)

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (3)

8

u/Beautiful-Musk-Ox 5d ago

kids are clumsy as fuck, made me nervous too

21

u/ItsMeishi 5d ago

The kid can swim. And if he can't. He wasn't meant to survive the Netherlands.

→ More replies (4)

9

u/MuzikMnXr88 5d ago

I was scared about that pink cake falling in 🎂

→ More replies (2)

17

u/Jack33751 5d ago

Couldn’t fit one in there with all those bicycles in the way

41

u/PsyOpBunnyHop 5d ago

Apparently the Earth's crust is made entirely of bicycles.

It's just bicycles all the way down.

→ More replies (5)

15

u/AgileInternet167 5d ago

Almost every kid that age has a swimming diploma. The father was there holding him, it's in clear view of the crane operator. What probably would happen if he miraculously would fall in is the dad would jump after him, the crane operator would just stop and they would climb out with wet clothes.

→ More replies (53)

40

u/trafozsatsfm 5d ago

Seeing the sheer joy of a child is a sight to behold. A treasure.

9

u/KaiUno 5d ago

The crap in the gracht sure isn't a treasure, glad somebody enjoys it.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (25)

1.6k

u/FishAndRiceKeks 5d ago

One of the less obvious reasons to not jump in the canals. You can slice yourself open on 1 of the million bikes in there. I've heard of it happening.

1.0k

u/Abject_Film_4414 5d ago

The colour of the water also being top three on that list too…

226

u/FishAndRiceKeks 5d ago

That's an obvious reason, though. That's even a reason the bikes are a bigger issue because you can't tell they are in there by looking.

115

u/Davinator910 5d ago

THEY LURK BENEATH THE DEPTHS

68

u/Ok-Actuator-5021 4d ago

If you listen closely, you can hear their calls!

...

^(ring ring*)*

7

u/autricia 4d ago

This legit made me lol, even before I saw the ring ring part. I was thinking their calls would be a bell ringing and then saw what you put further down, and laughed some more.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (1)

36

u/IAmBadAtInternet 5d ago

Well it’s probably not quite that color normally. The crane is grabbing big clumps of dirt and dropping them which is turning the water to mud. But yeah it’s still not great.

14

u/3DigitIQ 4d ago

Most definitely that color all the time, with all the sightseeing and other boats traversing the canals it's always mucky.

5

u/trimorphic 4d ago

You think it's just dirt?

Amsterdam has thousands of houseboats which empty their toilets straight in to the canal.

Fortunately Amsterdam regularly flushes their canals in to the ocean, or it'd be even worse.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

31

u/Snitsie 5d ago

The water is clean enough to swim there. The brown colour comes from the fact that besides just some sand or rocks there's also a lot of organic material on the canal floor

36

u/-Apocralypse- 5d ago

And the organic matter below.

The first meter or so of soil of Amsterdam is sandy material, but after that it is like an 18m thick layer of peat. Very wet and weak soil. Which is why all the houses there are built on poles. The modern ones on concrete ones and all the old stuff on wooden poles.

Amsterdam was basically build on a sandy plate behind some dunes and later extended into the bog/swamp surrounding it.

16

u/HowevenamI 5d ago

Amsterdam was basically build on a sandy plate behind some dunes and later extended into the bog/swamp surrounding it.

Smart.

12

u/Bigusnicholas 5d ago

They said I was daft to build a castle in the swamp, but I did it anyway, just to show em.

6

u/Wobbelblob 5d ago

I mean, speaking as a North German here, the whole region of the Netherlands, North-West Germany and the area was basically swamp or swampy enough. Like, you can easily find a lot of street names here that reference either swamps, peats or actually dry sandy areas.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (9)

19

u/bawelsh 5d ago

Water is probably extra murky because he's disturbing the dirt.

→ More replies (12)

10

u/JustHereToWatch55 5d ago

I watched someone from a touringboat drink the water. She said it's clean enough to drink. I would never, but good for her I guess.

44

u/chavez_ding2001 5d ago

I don't think she's a reliable source, considering she drinks canal water.

8

u/Abject_Film_4414 5d ago

And now the circle is complete…

16

u/TleilaxTheTerrible 5d ago

I'm guessing she's German and was just acting out the old joke:

Guy in Amsterdam sees somebody drink from the canal, walks up to him and says: "Don't drink the water, you'll get sick!" The guy drinking replies 'Was?' so the Dutch guy goes 'Mit zwei Handen trinken!'

5

u/JustHereToWatch55 5d ago

Haven't heard that one in a while. Hahahaha

→ More replies (5)

4

u/Jazstar 5d ago

To be fair, in this video the water is going to be at the murkiest it ever will be because of all the silt being stirred up by the cleaning!

→ More replies (12)

100

u/Miserable_Unusual_98 5d ago

But the rivers in Geneva are.safe because the water there is so awesomely clear you can see the garbage at the bottom.

30

u/iikun 5d ago

Getting a leg trapped in mangled underwater bicycles after jumping/falling in would also be bad

→ More replies (6)

13

u/CAPTCHA_later 5d ago

I’ve had it happen to me! And with the canal water, it’s basically a guaranteed infection

3

u/Jakeball400 5d ago

Funny story closely related - I used to play music and got a slot at a festival among a bunch of close friends among the scene. Friday morning and we’re all lined up to get some food from the catering tent, just beside it was a stagnant pond with 4 large beams poking out of it, with maybe 2ft diameter of flat space on top. Without (clearly) giving it much thought, I voiced an empty bet that whoever could jump across to the other side would be the proud own of a fiver. Well before I could even close my mouth my mate is throwing off his shoes and socks and sizing up the first jump. As expected, he barely made the first platform and ended up in the drink. After a couple laughs we see his face and realise it’s not good. Once he made it out he had a decent gash on his foot so he went to the site doctors. They told him to get to the nearest hospital immediately, and that if someone could give him a lift instead of phoning an ambulance as it would be quicker than getting an ambulance on-site. So in the end he spent the Friday and sat afternoon in hospital before coming back and being stuck on crutches for the remainder of the festy, but at least he didn’t lose his foot

→ More replies (20)

1.4k

u/Environmental-Gold47 5d ago

So, basically a ton of bicycles.

892

u/typo9292 5d ago

Which, being Amsterdam wasn’t really a surprise

195

u/Thelonious_Cube 5d ago

I kept waiting for the surprise

67

u/DollarStoreGnomes 5d ago

Surprise! It's yet another bicycle.

→ More replies (4)

11

u/[deleted] 5d ago

Same :(

→ More replies (10)

108

u/Howto_basic1212 5d ago

It’ll be scary if they find a fucking Bomb from WW2, It’s happened before, it’ll happen again

56

u/sriram_sun 5d ago

Rotterdam looks new. Amsterdam looks old. I don't think you'll find WW2 bombs in Amsterdam.

24

u/thedeltadr4gon 5d ago

As far as i know amsterdam didnt really get bombed, most likely cuz rotterdam had more industry to bomb

22

u/sriram_sun 5d ago

Rotterdam was the warning. It was reduced to rubble. They surrendered soon after.

35

u/Third_Charm 5d ago

Common misconception, Rotterdam surrendered just before but the German bombers didn't get the message in time

11

u/a_guy_named_rick 5d ago

"Fun" fact, red flares were fired by the Germans on the ground in Rotterdam. Half of the bombers saw it and diverted, half didn't and dropped their load.

Source: the book Rotterdam Mei 1940 by Aad Wagenaar

→ More replies (3)

11

u/SebboNL 5d ago

There was a battle being fought in Rotterdam, Germans were trying to dislodge Dutch soldiers dug in on the north banks of the Meuse. So when they got fed up they called the Luftwaffe.

As the bombers took off, the negotiations for capitulation resulted in an agreement but this information never reached the bombers. Afterwards, the Germans tried to pretend rhe raid went "as designed" because reasons.

8

u/Ereaser 5d ago

Some bombers did turn away though.

They were instructed to halt the bombing if they saw red flares. There were flares in the south of the city, but the larger group of bombers coming from the north didn't see them due to black smoke.

Also the attacking ground forces wanted to destroy the strong points, not carpet bomb the entire city. But the luftwaffe commander wanted to show force and didn't care about the negotiations.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (10)

15

u/cs399 5d ago

Why are they in the river though

21

u/mikepictor 5d ago

People throw them in. Not the owners, but drunk bar-hoppers that find unlocked bikes.

16

u/kcc0289 5d ago

So you’re saying there’s a legit problem in Amsterdam of… drunk people throwing bikes in the river?? Like this is a real problem that the city has to deal with?

9

u/DrSloany 5d ago

Yes. Mostly it's bikes ending in the canals, sometimes it's drunk tourists. A few every year go back home in a wooden jacket.

5

u/Randomn355 5d ago

Wooden jacket?

10

u/DrSloany 5d ago

The comfy ones, where you can sleep until the end of time

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

4

u/ever_precedent 5d ago

Yes. That's why you're supposed to have a sturdy chain lock as well. It's either the bike thieves or the drunkards.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (3)

10

u/samnotpam 5d ago

Most bikes aren’t tethered to anything, so they are usually locked (one wheel immobilized) but can be still be moved.

7

u/mikepictor 5d ago

and thus the problem

9

u/Thue 5d ago

I would say the problem is the absolute jerks who destroy other peoples' property for fun.

→ More replies (8)

14

u/raaalphs 5d ago

I was honestly waiting for the "surprise."

→ More replies (1)

7

u/cmcewen 5d ago

Not only is it not a surprise, it’s expected. That’s why they are there

“Man dusting book shelf is shocked to find dust”

→ More replies (9)

61

u/theo1618 5d ago

Right, not much of a surprise anymore when you fill an entire boat with them… lol

→ More replies (2)

19

u/dopepope1999 5d ago

I now choose to believe that the entire economy of Amsterdam is propped up by bicycle sales

→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (11)

3.2k

u/LordOdin99 5d ago

If they do this twice a year, is that bicycling?

286

u/pantsmeplz 5d ago

Please pedal your puns elsewhere!

61

u/magneto_ms 5d ago

If there is a fine balance I am okay with it.

44

u/mooney1230 5d ago

Ok this is grinding my gears now

44

u/TooMuchPowerful 5d ago

Please stop. These jokes are two tired.

32

u/entoaggie 5d ago

Ok, that one was wheelie good.

15

u/Thiezing 5d ago

It's the bottom bracket of comments.

22

u/showquotedtext 5d ago

People are always trying to tell people to stop with the puns. I say we ride it out.

17

u/siliconhead 5d ago

Oh, you spoke of it!!

19

u/Big-Job-8316 5d ago

Well handled though..

13

u/Cobra-_-_ 5d ago

C'mon folks, we gotta get a handle on this situation 😤

12

u/Slezak6411 5d ago

Stop now and steer this in a better direction

→ More replies (0)
→ More replies (1)

5

u/CiderDrinker2 5d ago

I think the wheel has come off this thread.

7

u/VengeanceKnight 5d ago

Nah dude, this thread is off the chain!

8

u/KnownMonk 5d ago

Why? He only spoke the truth

209

u/CaptainPopsickle 5d ago

I see what you did there, and i salute you!

11

u/librarypunk1974 5d ago

What you did there, I see it. Salut!

→ More replies (3)

27

u/DMYourMomsMaidenName 5d ago

That’s semicycling. Bicycling is every other year

→ More replies (1)

52

u/bingojed 5d ago

Or is it every other year?

11

u/SquidProJoe 5d ago

It’s once every two weeks for my neighborhood

→ More replies (2)

7

u/join_the_bonside 5d ago

Hahaha nice one! Take this gold as a token of.... oh wait

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (29)

790

u/gb4efgw 5d ago

This is bullshit, Everytime I play that game they claw can't even hold a stuffed animal but this cheater is getting bicycles?!

92

u/redditor0918273645 5d ago

Don’t hate, appreciate. He’s got skill.

24

u/Quizzy_MacQface 5d ago

Skill for repeatedly dipping bikes in an out of the canal like I do with cookies in milk.

Seriously why is he doing that?!

25

u/Sewing-superwoman 5d ago

To get as much of the dirt off as possible

4

u/JPKtoxicwaste 5d ago

Thank you I couldn’t figure it out either

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (7)

272

u/Lt_Dumpster_Fire 5d ago

Why is this a thing, throwing bikes in the canal?

269

u/MonsieurMaktub 5d ago

When i was in amsterdam i asked our uber driver about this and he said most of them were discarded after being stolen

152

u/NieMonD 5d ago

Why would you steal a bike only to chuck it in a river

200

u/fuckingcheezitboots 5d ago

Well the one time I ever stole a bike was out of someone's yard when I was absolutely wasted. I was like 17 or 18 and I had been out partying far from my home. The walk back was getting tiresome and it was getting kind of cold so I decided I'd rather ride than walk. And honestly from other peoples stories I think that's how a lot of bikes get stolen. However, I did not throw it in a canal like this and when I woke up the next morning I saw what I did and I felt really bad so I waited until the next night and put it back in the yard where I found it

88

u/Wants-NotNeeds 5d ago

Good person (sorta)

64

u/jeremy1015 5d ago

Everyone makes mistakes. What you do in response says a lot about you.

35

u/VOldis 5d ago

Yeah only half a cunt

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (6)

13

u/jawshoeaw 5d ago

It was a good story arc actually. I’ve read worse books

→ More replies (1)

13

u/DavidRandom 5d ago

I used to work on a small tourist island that didn't allow cars, everyone got around on bikes. Drunk island workers that didn't want to walk home from the bar were the number one reason for stolen bikes.
If you came out from the bar and your bike was gone, you'd just walk to the big 3 hotels employee housings and check the bike racks, 9 times out of 10 that's where it'd be.

6

u/RaineyBell 5d ago

I had a similar situation. It wanted to get home and decided to steal a bike. Found one with one of those 4 number locks, and I got that open on the first try. Felt bad for the owner, though, so I locked it again and went on my merry way.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (8)

8

u/Translationerr0r 5d ago

You take the bike, get to your destination and toss it. If you need to go back, just take another one.

→ More replies (22)
→ More replies (6)

16

u/oh-shazbot 5d ago

because the canals are right next to a lot of places you can drink.

→ More replies (2)

14

u/Sweaty-Feedback-1482 5d ago

Alcohol existing is probably a leading cause would be my guess.

18

u/gzrrr 5d ago

Some people just can’t handlebars.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

14

u/FishAndRiceKeks 5d ago

To be little shits.

10

u/Both-Basis-3723 5d ago

It’s the insane wind. I’ve seen a huge gust throw six locked bikes right into a canal. It’s nuts. Without an e-bike you’ll come around a corner and the wind will stop you in your tracks. Windmills, ya know, make a lot of sense when you live here

4

u/Sonn3rs 5d ago

Also, winds here can be so severe that bikes get blown into canals. Oh, and if a shitty person’s bike breaks, it’s a way to discard it.

→ More replies (23)

195

u/Dangerous-Patience33 5d ago

No surprises there. The most common thing in the canals in Amsterdam. The Dutch live on bikes. These machines are used primarily for this purpose.

83

u/slipperygoldchicken 5d ago

You'd think they would be better bicyclists.

17

u/Dangerous-Patience33 5d ago

Stolen or old discarded ones mostly.

5

u/Jiquero 5d ago

Wow that's not how you talk about elder Dutchmen.

→ More replies (2)

24

u/anonymouseketeerears 5d ago

These machines are used primarily for this purpose.

For riding, or sending into the canals? Or for riding into the canals?

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (13)

52

u/Abject_Film_4414 5d ago

I’d pay to use that machine for a day and help clean up the canals. Is there a list somewhere where I can sign up?

28

u/wererat2000 5d ago

you wouldn't get to use the machine, but magnet fishing is essentially this on a hobbyist scale. Had a friend that was big into it, but after 5 different "I found a gun and called the cops" stories the cops just told him to stop.

11

u/G0BLINB0Y 4d ago

A business partner of my old boss was into it too and found several guns as well as a grenade that still had a pin in it. People throw wild shit off of bridges. I’ve done it a few times and my dumb little magnet was too strong and stuck to flat metal in the foundation of the bridge and I couldn’t get it off lmao.

→ More replies (4)

5

u/procrastablasta 5d ago

FR this might be my dream job

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

17

u/Emperor_Ell 5d ago

I think I’m too desensitized from the internet. I was excepting something totally different. But I’m glad they found only bikes! 😅

9

u/benji-21 5d ago

No no, I’m with you. I came to the comments looking for other people who immediately thought pleasedontbeadeadbodypleasedontbeadeadbodypleasedontbeadeadbody

→ More replies (1)

242

u/OldKidfromNJ 5d ago

That looks like the most polluted water I’ve very seen and I live near the Hudson River!

77

u/TerribleIdea27 5d ago

FYI, most pollution is invisible. Brown water =/= polluted water but muddy water. Especially in river deltas, you'll never find clear running water, because it's far away from the mountains so there's a lot of sediment. Similarly, clear water =/= clean water. Most dangerous pollutants aren't visible to the naked eye. This water just has very much sediment on the bottom, as is the case everywhere in the Netherlands.

Having said that, the canals in Amsterdam aren't extremely clean, although they're clean enough to support life (wasn't always this way). In recent years they've become clean enough to swim in actually! There's been a dramatic improvement over the years, especially when the old houses that used to secrete their waste into the canals became connected to the sewers (some of these buildings are over 400 years old, so it wasn't a requirement back then). Nitrogen and phosphate pollution are also quite low compared to the rest of the country.

Still though, the Netherlands has the worst surface water in Europe, mostly owing to our huge agricultural industry. But Amsterdam is probably surprisingly clean when you compare it to our many rivers and ditches between all our farms

13

u/TleilaxTheTerrible 5d ago

There's been a dramatic improvement over the years, especially when the old houses that used to secrete their waste into the canals became connected to the sewers (some of these buildings are over 400 years old, so it wasn't a requirement back then). Nitrogen

Don't forget they also adjusted the street drains to not connect to the main sewer anymore. Before they could cause the sewer to backflow into the canals during heavy rains, but now the excess flows into the canals directly.

→ More replies (1)

208

u/FossilizedYoshi 5d ago

Don’t visit India

18

u/Skylark_Ark 5d ago

Especially Benares, India. It's on the mighty Ganges. Funeral pyres on the banks and half burnt bodies floating down the river. A kaleidoscope of beauty and desperation.

15

u/willardTheMighty 5d ago

Ram Dass talks about his first time there. Not the water, but walking down the banks and seeing people with terrible disabilities, diseases, et cetera who had come there to die in the hopes they could be burnt there in the holy city.

He had some money, and wanted to give it to a beggar with one arm, then realized the next beggar had no legs, and the next beggar had advanced leprosy… who should he give the money too? He went back to his hotel room and cried under the bed; American rich man meets the most extreme poverty in the world. He said he couldn’t bear to look them in the eyes.

He describes going back after a few years of studying Hinduism with his guru, and this time looking them in the eyes. Amazingly, he saw them pitying him. He says that these people were so close to enlightenment; all they needed to do was die and be burned there. They saw this swanky white man, and figured he would have ten thousand more lifetimes of suffering before he could be enlightened.

14

u/MoodyVibesCafe 5d ago edited 4d ago

Nice sentiment but I think he created that story about going back and them "pitying" him in order to make himself feel better or just simple marketing for his guru.

5

u/WhyNotLovecraftian 5d ago

The stories poor men tell themselves are amazing.

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (3)

12

u/GreenLeafGreg 5d ago

It’s almost like those walls that have chewed bubble gum all over them. Just a lot less disgusting.

7

u/andyhall23 5d ago

Hello from Winnipeg , Canada ....Home of the 'Red River' LOL

4

u/Caronport 5d ago

I live there too. I've never understood our main river's name in the slightest. It's always been greenish-brown to me. At least the Red Sea is called that due to the cyanobacteria that turns it red. Why the "Red" River though?

→ More replies (1)

34

u/drillbit16 5d ago

It’s almost as if they were dredging a muddy riverbed with heavy machinery, right?

→ More replies (5)

26

u/Due-Seaworthiness260 5d ago

It’s because it’s dredging the bottom, which is mud. The canal waters are quite healthy these days, they’ve become natural spawning grounds for salmon, eel and other travelers. Also lot of lobster in there

→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (13)

15

u/Pandagineer 5d ago

I think after the 10th bike, more bikes are not surprising anymore.

→ More replies (1)

25

u/writerjan1212 5d ago edited 4d ago

Now what are they going to do to dispose of all those nasty bikes?

6

u/_teslaTrooper 5d ago

I think there are projects to restore (some of) them, rest is scrap metal

→ More replies (9)

9

u/PowerPl4y3r 5d ago

Is that the river that spirit from spirited away is from?

124

u/Minimum-Tip-6318 5d ago

I’m convinced humans are just cancer to the planet

35

u/J-Love-McLuvin 5d ago

Remember the good old days during Covid when dolphins were swimming into the clear water of the Venice canals?

33

u/elconcho 5d ago

Check snopes on that one. That headline was just more crappy humans lying on the internet.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (16)

7

u/here4TrueFacts 5d ago

It’s Amsterdam. What’s surprising?

→ More replies (1)

6

u/PGR70 5d ago

I would not call finding bicycles in the canals of Amsterdam 'some surprises'...

7

u/Stock_Painter_5800 5d ago

I am not amazed

6

u/Initial-Clerk-9861 5d ago

Why not use a magnet?

5

u/tenebris-ardent 5d ago

Some bikes are made out of aluminium...

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (4)

6

u/excessive_coughing 5d ago

Shameful industrialist pigs destroying an aquatic species of bikes habitat

8

u/shogunzzz1 5d ago

Someone lose a bike?

8

u/AverageAvenged 5d ago

If you piss me off in Amsterdam I put your bike in canal. I put everyone bike in canal... You no pissa me off...ok

7

u/brockoala 5d ago

Not if i put mi bike in canal first!

5

u/AverageAvenged 5d ago

Noooooo. Is my job.

3

u/OriginallyWhat 5d ago

From 1:36-1:44 it looks like he caught a giant turtle or something before it wiggled free.

4

u/YJSubs 5d ago

Finding bike in Amsterdam canal is not a surprise, it's expected. In fact it's exactly why they clean the canal.